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Stuttering Shell: sunday night brain dump.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

sunday night brain dump.

i feel my emotions waxing & waning once again.  in other words, i'm on the verge of a 'freak out.'  it happens from time to time.  c'est la vie. 

i spent the majority of my weekend working on all things grad school:  i wrote an abstract for an article about skinner, i answered four chapters worth of discussion questions related to family interaction, i read skimmed chapters on freud & erikson, i studied for an economics test AND i had every intention of reading the rest of one of skinner's books {but i didn't}.  this coming week isn't going to be any easier considering i have a presentation due and four papers to write.  ugh.  but, getting this degree will be worth it, right?

speaking of grad school...i meet with my advisor on thursday to get my "plan of action" squared away for the summer & fall semesters.  one of the required classes i need is reluctantly being offered this summer.  right now i'm just hoping & praying that i'll receive summer aid or else i can't take the class.  and, let's not even talk about the fall semester.  okay, let's:  um, NONE of the classes that i need to take for my degree program {i only have eight left} are even being offered.  well, not the three classes that are prereqs for the other five, at least.  what kind of bullhonkery is that?  i also told myself that i would decide {on thursday} if i was going to continue in the masters program or jump ship and work on getting my teaching license only.  i thought my mind was made up, but now i'm questioning my decision...

friday night was a happy night.  i had dinner with my family.  my whole family.  not just adam & the kids, but my parents AND my sister, too.  my heart was filled to the brim with love.  seriously, i was oozing with lovey-dovey-ness.  plus, it didn't hurt that we chowed down on pho & followed dinner with froyo.  yep, that's how we roll.

speaking of my sister, i love her dearly and i miss her like crazy.  she was in town {well, on the other side of the water} this past week.  her husband coaches lacrosse and every year he brings his team down to our area for scrimmage matches.  anyways, she comes down to offer support & act as a chaperone.  last year i didn't get to spend much time with her because i was working, but this year i spent two days with her and i loved it.  all we did was shop {which wasn't good for either of our budgets} but it was so much fun.

i'll share the bounty of our shopping spree soon.  promise.  i mean, i feel like i owe it to you all to show off the kate spade wallet i got for $36 and the banana republic jeans that cost me a mere $10.  {that's not all i bought...}

i got my car back.  my lil' altima has been at my parents house since the beginning of the month. 
me + two dogs, two kids, one husband + shopping at costco + my lil' altima = no room for anyone
so, i drove my mom's quest home.  i was a minivan momma once again {we leased a honda hot-essy a while back}.  sadly, my parents picked up their van this weekend & i'm once again whipping emmy the altima around down. 

adam watched his left front tire bounce across four lanes of road last week.  tire, wheel...the whole damn thing.  when i got to the scene, his truck had a gangsta lean going was on the rotor.  what a mess.  i'm very thankful he was able to fix most of it.  the truck just needs body work now.  i'm also extra, super duper thankful that he was not hurt and that no one was involved in this fiasco.  i drove down the road where this happened late last week and saw the mark in the road where his truck slid for nearly 20 feet.  i'd be lying if i said tears didn't well up in my eyes.

i want to move.  i'm ready for a fresh start.  if i were single & childless, change would be easy.  but, alas, i'm not.  the logistics of anything related to a move/fresh start will take some careful planning & a lot of convincing with adam.

i haven't subbed yet.  i'm a chicken.

i DID accept a month-long temporary position and will be working full-time in just over a week.  i'm eternally grateful that my mother has offered to come down & help with getting the kids home from school so we don't have to find or pay for childcare.  i just hope i'm able to juggle work, school, kids, the house, the dogs...

once this month-long assignment is over i'll start subbing.  no excuses.  promise.

and, finally, and probably most important, is the fact that i need to let go of someone.  her "friendship," if you will, isn't healthy for me and her actions {or lack of} indicate to me that she isn't interested, so why should i waste my time.  is this relationship toxic?  to an extent, yes.  were we ever really good friends?  no.  so, why is this so hard for me to do?  i really couldn't tell you.

oh, and everyone who commented on my febreze review {there are 5 of you}, please email me your address. you're all winners in my book!  nevermind the fact that i said i would choose a winner on march 11th...d'oh!

whew.  my mind needed this.  seriously.

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Blogger Sarah said...

Glad you got this out! Glad Adam is safe, what a horrible experience for him. Josh witnessed something very similar about a month ago. ugh.

Your dump posts are way more intriguing than mine.

Mar 28, 2011, 12:08:00 AM  
Blogger BroncoMom said...

Wow Shell, that's a load of stuff. So happy that you got all of that off your chest.
Have a great week!!

Mar 28, 2011, 2:01:00 PM  

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