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Stuttering Shell: Somebody call the plumber!

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Somebody call the plumber!

Let me preface this story by saying that potty training my son was an ordeal. We switched from regular diapers to cloth diapers around the time he was two in hopes that it might ease the transition and make potty training easier (and, aside from the $$$ start up fees, cloth diapering WAS indeed cheaper than buying disposables). He did well and peeing in the potty became a breeze; however, pooping in the potty was a different story. Let's just say that I had heard all the stories about children holding "it" in and how potty training can sort of "mess" with their feelings of control and security -- yeah, we had THOSE issues. Aidan was not about to poop in the potty...it was his poop after all and no one elses. ANYWAY, after battling for many, many months we finally leaped that hurdle...only to realize that he refused to learn and even try to wipe his own hiney. His reason (and I quote), "I don't want to get poop on my fingers." Gee...thanks...and you think I do? So, here we are, FINALLY at the stage where he wipes his own butt (thank goodness for flushable wipes!) although I still have to spray Shout on the skid marks that are in his Transformer "unnawears"...

Bedtime is at 8:30pm sharp in our house during the school week (Sunday through Thursday) and during the week WITHOUT FAIL either one of the kids is gonna have to go poop right before bedtime. It always happens. Tonight, it was Aidan's turn. OK, no big deal. Poop happens. He'll wipe his own butt and wash his hands when he's finished.

Adam and I were on the couch watching last night's "Top Chef" when Aidan came out of the bathroom to apologize to me for using too much toilet paper.

"Mommy...uh...I forgot and I used too much toilet paper."

"How much is too much?"

"Uh...a whole bunch. A big ball of it. I flooded the bathroom...but I wiped my own butt!"

"You did WHAT?"

"I wiped my own butt!"

"No, no...after you wiped your butt...what's wrong in the bathroom?"

I shot Adam a look.

By this time, Malia ran to the bathroom...I mean, come on, she's not going to pass up the chance to witness something that her brother has done whether it's right or wrong...siblings LIVE for this kind of stuff!

Adam finally gets up off the couch and I'm hot on his heels.

Sure enough, water is swirling dangerously close to the rim of the toilet bowl and there is a big ole wad of T.P. stuck in the toilet. A whole lot of T.P. So much T.P. that I was surprised there was even any left on the roll. Immediately, Aidan chimes, "Don't worry, I'll go get the plunger!"

Oh, geez...here we go, I thought.

After being side-tracked in the living room by a television commercial and a trip back to the bathroom to watch the water swirl in the toilet, he comes back to the bathroom with the plunger (pretty sad that our kids know where to find the plunger, huh...in MY bathroom...don't ask). Adam plunges the toilet a couple times to dislodge the big BALL of toilet paper, I wipe off the seat and Aidan proclaims, "See, it's all fixed now!"

*sigh*

KIDS.

I would so totally take skid marked "unnawears" over a clogged toilet any day (this just made me have flashbacks of the day at work when my daughter clogged the office toilet and there were little turds regurgitating out of the toilet.....but that's a different blog).

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24 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, poop. There is absolutely nothing to humble you more in motherhood than poop. You spend the first couple of months wearing it, the next year gagging at the smell because they've started to eat real food, and then potty training. You have to pretend to LOVE poop! Nothing makes you happier! My dd took this to extreme when she pooped on the floor one time. She then presented me with the excrimental present. I assume the thought going through her head was, "Hey, you know who just loves this stuff? My mom!"

Feb 25, 2009, 11:19:00 PM  
Blogger Sassy Southern Belle said...

here's a little love;) cute story, I can definitely identify! Takes me back to when my kids were young! Keep sharing the great stories! Samantha

Feb 25, 2009, 11:21:00 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Oh my. I know exactly what you're saying. I haven't had the pleasure of one actually coming to me telling me that they've flooded the toilet. When it happens we find out on our trip to the bathroom. I'm in the process of training my third and it's very challenging. Just tonight, we put a diaper on him as he got ready to go to bed and he peed in it once and took it off and put it into the garbage and informed us that he'd peed, causing us to have to get yet another diaper. And to think I have one more to potty train. Yaay me!! Well, I enjoyed your story here. It's true to life and reminds me that i'm not on my own.

Feb 25, 2009, 11:40:00 PM  
Blogger Peggy said...

Poop happens ,it sure does. Wait till they get a little older and then you can tease them if the smell is bad and say "You ate that!!
Life is fun!

Feb 26, 2009, 5:43:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Vanburenmom from MomLogic chiming in!

POOP... the worse thing in the world is POOP... I hate POOP.. Seriously my son would hold it forever than go in his undies and deny it... UMM I can smell it and see that lump in your pants!!!

Speaking of poop, the baby just pooped her pants... UGH...STINKY

Feb 26, 2009, 7:30:00 AM  
Blogger Kathleen W. said...

LOL, (or should I write, COL--cry out loud). My son is 11 months so we're still a while away from potty training. Honestly, I dread it after remembering the ordeals my mom went through with my brothers, especially wetting the bed. Aiden sounds just like my one brother, who pooped ok except that he didn't want to sit on the toilet seat. He would actually squat on it, with his feet on the seat. Not sure what that was about! I'm just hoping things go smoothly with my son. We use cloth diapers, so I'm hoping that it's a little easier to potty train.

Feb 26, 2009, 8:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How funny, it's a great story! I totally remember going through that with my little one, that boy did not want to use the darn potty! Aidan sounds like he must keep you pretty busy!

- Marie.

Feb 26, 2009, 9:06:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great story! And beautiful names for your kids by the way. My youngest is 2 and learning how to go potty. Poo is not a big issue yet - he's actually done it a few times in the toilet. He does not want to use the potty we gave him - straight for the big toilet like his 5 year old brother. My problem with this one? He tries to catch the pee once he sees it. Then he likes to "flick" himself because he must have seen his brother shake after going. Once I break that habit, I'll be very happy!

Feb 26, 2009, 9:22:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great story! And beautiful names for your kids by the way. My youngest is 2 and learning how to go potty. Poo is not a big issue yet - he's actually done it a few times in the toilet. He does not want to use the potty we gave him - straight for the big toilet like his 5 year old brother. My problem with this one? He tries to catch the pee once he sees it. Then he likes to "flick" himself because he must have seen his brother shake after going. Once I break that habit, I'll be very happy!

Feb 26, 2009, 9:23:00 AM  
Blogger Trina said...

Oh my word, that is hilarious. I have a 3 1/2 year old and he will still NOT poop in the toilet. We are not quite sure what to do, but hold on to the hope that it's gotta happen someday. I just wish that day had been months ago LOL

The stories us moms have sometimes...

Feb 26, 2009, 9:34:00 AM  
Blogger Trina said...

Oy, I hate IE, it keeps eating my comments.

What I was trying to say before my last comment disappeared is that I have a 3 1/2 year old who still won't poop in the toilet. We aren't sure what to do, but just hold on to the hope that it just has to happen one day. I just wish that day had been months ago. LOL

Feb 26, 2009, 10:15:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

RP Mom from Momlogic checking in!! Very funny post!! We are just finishing potty training our son!! Great post. Thanks for sharing with us!! I look forward to reading more of your blog. Have a great day!

Feb 26, 2009, 10:20:00 AM  
Blogger Rattled Mom said...

Hilarious! We haven't had a flooded toilet in a while...but this took me right back. My two youngest are still a couple of years away from potty training. I'll be on guard, though...it's just when you think "poop happens - they'll wipe their own hiney" that disaster strikes! :)

Feb 26, 2009, 10:22:00 AM  
Blogger Pricousins said...

wow... what a story! hmmm... that last sentence was the real kicker though!

Feb 26, 2009, 12:36:00 PM  
Blogger lace said...

We are in the midst of potty training my niece. She likes to go when it's nap time or bed time or when you want her to sit at the table and eat or when you buckle her into the car. Never when you actually want her to try.

Feb 26, 2009, 12:57:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great story. I can barely remember toilet training my kids. However, we moved into a new apartment last year and the toilets don't take much to clog. So now I often have to plunge the toilet even without kids around.

Feb 26, 2009, 1:12:00 PM  
Blogger LilyBiscuit said...

Yes....I've been there A LOT!!! We have 2 plungers, sort of a his and hers. We had my son use wipes for a while instead of TP and the toilet was even harder to plunge when he flushed them. Ha! Thanks to Mom Logic for sending me here.....I love your blog...and your city! vac924@gmail.com

Feb 26, 2009, 1:35:00 PM  
Blogger Karen said...

This was too funny. I think every parent has been in your shoes (make that wet shoes). I really enjoyed your tale of the plunger and toilet balls. I'm looking forward to reading more of your stories.
Karen Koval-momlogic member

Feb 26, 2009, 3:08:00 PM  
Blogger Karen said...

This was too funny. I think every parent has been in your shoes (make that wet shoes). I really enjoyed your tale of the plunger and toilet balls. I'm looking forward to reading more of your stories.
Karen Koval-momlogic member

Feb 26, 2009, 3:11:00 PM  
Blogger DebbieinMemphis said...

That's a great story. I'm sure, as parents, we've all been there one time or another. Thank heavens we've got indoor plumbing and we're not dealing with the outhouses our grandparents had to use. Hmmmm, 10 degrees outside and a foot of snow...Nope! Don't think I'd have to potty until Spring ;-)

Feb 26, 2009, 4:04:00 PM  
Blogger Jess said...

What a hilarious story! It actually reminds me of college... 4 girls to one very old bathroom and plumbing makes for not a pretty site. We not only had a plunger but a snake by the toilet too!

Feb 26, 2009, 6:41:00 PM  
Blogger captaincarebear said...

Gee, my kids know where the plunger is too. Clogged toilets are a regular ritual around here. And yes, I did sit for a half an hour listening to my kid scream because he didn't want to let his poop out in the potty so he kept squeezing it back in and then he was ticked off because it hurt to do that. The saga doesn't end.

Feb 26, 2009, 10:33:00 PM  
Blogger captaincarebear said...

Loved your story especially after the "poopy day" I had today. Good for a laugh. Keep up the entertainment.

Feb 26, 2009, 10:56:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hilarious!!!!

Mar 11, 2009, 12:04:00 AM  

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