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Stuttering Shell: this is for real.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

this is for real.

thank you EVERYONE for your sweet words of encouragement either here, on twitter, on facebook or via email.  i was a little reluctant to share such a personal issue.  marriages are not perfect.  and, often times, it is those {external} issues that weigh heavy on a marriage & cause the marriage to start crumbling.  and, right now, we are dealing with a lot of extraneous crap.

i'll be honest.  adam & i have crumbled more than once.  in the 16 years we've been together {eight years of those years we've been married}, we've seen some really great highs & some really awful lows.  c'est la vie, right? 

marriage isn't easy.  it's definitely not for the faint of heart.  there is no such thing as a perfect marriage {in my opinion}.  my parents {who have been married for 38 years} will be the first to tell you that the road to a successful marriage is full of bumps, wrong turns & dead ends along the way.  and, boy, they so right.

this hurdle that adam & i are facing and, hopefully, about to leap is a big one.  a very big one.  to put things bluntly, we are very, very, very close to losing everything that we have.  everything.  and, this is through no fault of our own.  no, we are at fault {in a sense} because adam trusted his father. 

adam & i are not wealthy people.  if i told you our bank account balance, you'd probably think i was joking.  no, no...really...our bank account balances will either make you laugh hysterically or have you crying in a heartbeat.  paycheck to paycheck?  we live that way.  we've got our own mountain of debt that we pay every month {and have made such progress with, thankyouverymuch}.  we live in a modest home.  we live a modest lifestyle. 

we knew this was coming, yet we kept hope.  hope that things would be made right.  hope that adam wouldn't be held liable {what were we thinking?}.  hope that we would just wake up from this bad dream.  instead, we are living the bad dream.

but, we haven't given up hope.

adam called his father the other day.  the last time adam spoke to his father was nearly seven months ago.  at that time, adam's father told him that he no longer considered adam to be his son.  this time, adam chided his father's actions.  in return, adam's father told him "to have a nice life."

and we will.  we'll get through this.  together.  and, because of it, we'll be stronger than ever.    

{source}


*the only real name used was adam's name so don't use this post against me {you know who you are}.  details & facts have been purposely left out because my blog readers just don't need to know everything {no offense, y'all}.  however, i felt like i owed my readers some sort of an explanation as to why i've been so ridiculously moody & downright depressing lately.  the people who read this blog don't even know who "adam's father" really is.  the readers who do know who "adam's father" is are probably already very well aware of the situation.  nothing slanderous was said.  i didn't call you any names.  quite simply, i told the truth...and it hurts, doesn't it?

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4 Comments:

Blogger Bonnie said...

So sorry ya'll are having a hard time. Girl, you aren't alone struggling with debt. So many of us are. I get so jealous of all the moms that get to stay home with their babies, but then again...I'm thankful I have a job & can help pay our bills. Life isn't perfect, but we only live once & have to TRY to make the most of it. Praying for ya'll...
Bonnie

Jul 7, 2010, 12:56:00 AM  
Blogger Llama said...

Hi! I am a new follower! I love your blog!
I am so so sorry to hear that you have been going through some tough times. Thank you for sharing your story. You don't know much you help others when you tell about things like this. So many of us can probably relate to obstacles like this in our lives. It is through these times though, that we become stronger people, stronger couples. Wishing you the strength you need to get through this. Looking forward to reading more.

Jul 7, 2010, 9:31:00 AM  
Blogger Michelle @ Flying Giggles said...

Debt is something we are all facing, times are hard, but what really sucks is dealing with his father. This is the times you should be able to have support from family, maybe not financially, but definitely emotionally. Hang in there! I hope all works out for you two!

Jul 7, 2010, 1:23:00 PM  
Blogger Chelle said...

Oh, sweetie, first let me give you big hugs. I am so sorry you are going through all of this.

We're all here for you--and I couldn't agree more. Marriage is HARD. So, so hard.

Sending you lots of love!

Jul 7, 2010, 6:37:00 PM  

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