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5 Stars, It's NOT!

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Stuttering Shell: 5 Stars, It's NOT!

Sunday, June 7, 2009

5 Stars, It's NOT!

I've come to the realization that:
  1. We need a bigger house.
  2. We need an extra bedroom.
  3. We need a bigger house with an extra bedroom.

There is no such thing as a guest bedroom in our house. Not. At. All. Our humble little abode is bursting at the seams and, with only three bedrooms, I know people who live in apartments that are bigger than our house! Of course, given the housing market these days as well as our "work-in-progress" financial situation, any kind of a move or addition is out of the question.

So, if you come visit me, be prepared to sleep on the couch, sleep on an air mattress or sleep on the floor. Very rarely do we shuffle our children around in order to free up an extra bed, so if you do happen to spend the night here and you're actually sleeping on a REAL mattress then please consider yourself lucky.

Don't feel upset that you're sleeping on the couch. It's really quite comfortable and many a friend & family member has fallen asleep among it's soft cushions and fluffy pillows - don't worry, I do vacuum and launder the upholstery on a regular basis (besides, I also use the hell out of some Febreeze spray). If you're allergic to cats, I'm so sorry. We have three cats and you should have taken some Benadryl before you came over. Don't worry, though, they won't suck the breath out of you while you sleep...they'll just sleep ON you. Oh, and if you think you're going to be lucky enough to actually sleep in late at my house - think again. My children are up usually between 7am to 8am (earlier if it's a school day) and they, honestly, have no regard for anyone sleeping on the couch. If they want to watch cartoons and eat cereal while you snore & drool on my throw pillows, trust me, they will, so please be prepared to wear ear plugs and an eye mask.

This ain't no B & B...I mean, I've already told you that you're not getting a BED to sleep on and as for breakfast, well, I hope you like strawberry flavored instant oatmeal because we have a TON of it (thanks, Mom!). Oh, yeah...and as for the luxe blankets and bed linens you would expect to have me toss your way when it's bedtime...well...I hate to disappoint you but you're only going to get a navy blue fleece blanket with Clifford the Big Red Dog appliqued on it.

Sweet dreams!

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2 Comments:

Blogger Rachel said...

That really is an amazing couch. And if I can take the cats, anyone can take the cats! LOL!

Jun 7, 2009, 11:23:00 PM  
Blogger Rebecca Welch said...

So...what you're saying is-stay in a freaken hotel!

*wink*

Happy Monday!

Jun 8, 2009, 6:31:00 AM  

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