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Stuttering Shell: her attitude helped me.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

her attitude helped me.

it's cliche, i know, but whenever i am asked about an influential woman in my life i immediately think of my mother.  she's not just the woman who gave me life, but she's the woman who taught me how to live my life.

she and i have a pretty typical mother-daughter relationship.  it's not a perfect relationship, but it's definitely a loving relationship.  she and i are so alike that it's scary {at least that is what my husband tells me}.  it seems that we get a little closer the older i get.  and, now that i am a mother, i am finally understanding the reasons why she was so hard on me & my sister as we were growing up.

i think the thing about my mother that has influenced me the most is her attitude about life...and death.  nearly five years ago my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer.  the news came as a shock.  she had already lost a sister to breast cancer.  the news of my mother's diagnosis certainly sent shock waves through the family.  but, she was fortunate because it was not only caught early enough, but my mother had a doctor who rallied for her and was just as stubborn and demanding as my mother.  my mother did not endure chemo or radiation, but she did choose a radical procedure {in my opinion} to battle the cancer:  she opted for a single mastectomy.

my mother said goodbye to her left breast three days after christmas in 2006.  what most men glorify as a sex object, my mother saw it as the enemy.  to her, losing her breast meant losing something that could have possibly killed her.  i cried and cried when i saw her scar for the first time.  it started in her armpit and ran down and across her chest where her breast used to be.  she did not understand why i was sad.  she said that losing a breast did not make her any less of a woman.

not once did my mother ever show me that she felt vulnerable.  i know that behind closed doors i'm certain she was scared, frustrated and nervous about what could happen.  but, she never stopped being a mother.  even though she was fighting a battle against breast cancer, she never stopped fighting for her family.  she remained positive, encouraging and nurturing.  she was strong.

even today she still has a great attitude about life in general.  she's not scared of dying.  she lives life each day with no regrets and she does all that she can not just for me and my family, but for my kids and for my sister and her husband as well.  she's truly an inspiration, not just to me, but to anyone who is feeling a bit uncertain about their life whether they are battling an illness or not.



in honor of mother's day, please consider purchasing a gift for your mother {or any other influential woman in your life} a gift from macy's heart of haiti collection.  you can view the collection in its entirety by clicking here.

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disclosure:  I was selected for this very special “CleverHaiti” opportunity by Clever Girls Collective, which endorses Blog With Integrity. All opinions are my own.

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3 Comments:

Blogger BroncoMom said...

Enjoyed reading your post Shell.

May 4, 2011, 7:40:00 PM  
Blogger MommaKiss said...

love this, and bravo to your mother. my girlfriend recently had a double mastectomy, I've seen the scars. To her, they're a visual reminder that her breast tried to kill her.  I hope she is able to be a mother one day, to allow a child into her incredible life.

May 5, 2011, 12:41:00 PM  
Blogger Kate said...

So thankful that your mom is a survivor! What a great example that she has a great attitude!

May 7, 2011, 1:15:00 AM  

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